hey lets just say i have gotten a little sick of this xanga soooo therefore i am making a new one

http://www.xanga.com/shescreamsnsilence

i decided to exnay the previous entry because it was not only me feeling bad for myself but i re-read over it a few minutes ago and it made me sick that i said some of the things i said in it. i need to freakin get with the program and stop whining about "how much my life sucks" when it doesnt. some people have it 10 times worse then me and i need to appreciate it. if any of you read something that has anything to do with me feeling sorry for myself or if i whine to you, please feel free for the next time you see me.. slap me or something. i know that is is MY journal and that i can write about anything i want in it, but i dont like re-reading this stuff and looking back on how ridiculous i sounded.

the only thing that i should and am stressed about it my friends. i dont know who my true friends are. i mean some of them might be reading this right now and it might hurt to hears this, but its the truth. i feel like people only hang out with me when its on their conveniance. i mean last year is was so different, i guess its because of everyones ability to drive and stuff and i cant for a while. i mean that is understandable but my friends whom i used to be best friends with just suddenly dont wanna hang out anymore. it hurts, they talk about things that they are gunna do that night in front of me without even inviting me along. all my real friends it seems are at different schools, and i dont get to see them a lot either. dont get me wrong...i love most of everyone at BA and i do have good friends over there..you all know who you are and i appreciate you being there, but i just cant help but feel left out sometimes...oh well a part of life if making new friends and i think im doing that. me and cat have been talking a lot lately and i think that me and her have a lot in common. id like to get to know her a lot better and hang out with her more.

alright well i found this survey off of kelly's soo im gunna do it cuz im bored.

LAYER ONE // the basics
name: Lindsey Krsiten
current location: brentwood
eye color: blue
hair color: dark brown
height: 5'5''
zodiac Sign: cancer

LAYER TWO // on the inside
your heritage: white?
shoes you wore today: burks
your weakness: feeling sorry for myself
your fears: sadness
goal you'd like to achieve: get to know people before i judge them, ive had the problem in the past.

LAYER THREE // yesterday, today, tomorrow
your thoughts first waking up: what time is it?
your best physical feature: my eyes
your bedtime: weekdays: i try to go to bed around 11...weekends:...haha never
your most missed memory: my family being together


LAYER FOUR // your pick
pepsi or coke: coke...is this even a question?!
single or group dates: single date..
adidas or nike: nike
Lipton tea or nestea: mm neither...my mommas!
chocolate or vanilla: xanilla
cappuccino or coffee: cappuccino

LAYER FIVE // do you?
swear: yeaaa..bad habit
sing: haha i try
take a shower everyday: yesssss
think you’ve been in love: know ive been in love
like(d) high school: yea i guess its ok
get motion sickness: nope
think you're attractive: yea
get along with your parents: normally
think you're a health freak: depends on what it is
like thunderstorms: ohh love them
play an instrument: si

LAYER SIX // in the past month have you...
made out: yessss sir
gone on a date: yup
been dumped: nope
gone skinny dipping: yeah i go skinny dipping in winter all the time
dyed your hair: highlights count i guess??

LAYER SEVEN // ever...
played a game that required removal of clothing: hahah yes

beencaught "doing something": hmm ...i guess
gotten beaten up: nay

LAYER EIGHT // getting older
age you hope to be married: like 21
number of children: 3 or 4
how do you want to die: really old -- in my sleep or something
what do you want to be when you grow up: chef...i think it would be a lot of fun but then again its prolly not gunna happen, ill most likely end up just cooking for my family or something, ohter then that a lawyer because supposedly i can "fight with a brick wall"
what country would you most like to visit: france ahh i cant wait til the summer

LAYER NINE // in a boy
best eye color: really dark brown
best hair color: dark brown or black
short or long hair: long hair...not long hair like to their shoulders but like hair to their eyes
height: tall guys make me woooo
     haha yay its you john

LAYER TEN // in the numbers...
number of piercings: used to have like 5
number of tattoos: zip
number of scars on my body: wow too many
number of things in my past that I regret: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7...on and on...hasnt everyone

lkb

today has been a very very weird day. scary. everyone at BA is feeling the same thing, feeing that there is a burden that has been put on us, we all had dreams about death last night and just bad things were happing to everyone all day today. i dont know if its a sign from God but this cannot be a good sign for our school. we have all gone through so much together and something like this burden cannot be put on us. first there was an emergency meeting for the faculty today about some stuff, people that are normally all peppy werent, we found out the school lied to us about mrs. rogers and what happened to someone the other day(i dont really wanna mention name for their sake)and just the way people are acting, its really starting to scare me. i dont know what this is but im scared for everyone and i dont really know whats gunna happen, i just dont have a good feeling.

today my mom and doug went to marriage conselling, i feel really bad for my mom because she is so strong and shes been through so much, but i can just tell by looking at her that she is not happy. ive known that from the start of their marriage

this day just has not been a very good day...does anyone thats reading this feel that stress too?? ok well so that this is not a depressing entry, im gunna put in some pictures from the past few days. i love you all SO much

*ok edit*

sorry that was not a very apealing and happy entry, but im really scared, i dont know what it is and its scaring me to death. we prayed about it today and that  has helped things a lot. taken my mind off of it. to get my mind off of it i was just thinking about upcoming spring break and shaelyn coming up here and bonnaroo in the summer and europe for 2 weeks for my birthday. i guess i just gotta think about these things to get my mind off of this really depressing stuff

LKB

the necklace that john made me

amanda and kt

my bonnaroo buddy jessi

me and mimi

haha james galbierz everyone

i know im sexy! haha

ow owwww

heyy lee-mo

hye lee again

work it james

james and baby squirriel

me and my besttttt friend lilly